Chapter 9: Voice Response

           Conflicts are handled is so many different ways, it really depends on who the interaction is with. One of the most productive ways to solve conflict would be to use the voice response. Wood (2012) describes it as addressing conflict directly and attempts to resolve it. This is done by identifying problems or tensions and asserting a desire to deal with them. This is productive in that feelings aren't pent up or hidden; everything gets talked out right away.

            This type of interaction was displayed earlier this summer between my friend Carmen and I. We were working on a project in which we were dialoguing and Carmen was asking me some clarification questions.  I began to think about all of the other tasks I had to do before the end of the day. While I was lost in my brain trying to sort some type of schedule out, I must have put on my resting face. All of a sudden I see Carmen looking at me concerned. She allows a minute to pass but then says, “Are you ok?”  I was very confused by this question, so I replied “Yeah, I’m fine. Why?” She said that I had gotten this weird look on my face and seemed to be upset, so she wondered what she had done wrong. I told her that I was fine and had just been thinking through all of the things that I had yet to do; it was nothing to do with her. She told me that she thought I was mad at her for asking so many questions, when in reality it had been helpful for me to review. We talked about it a little more and I am glad that we did.  If this little instance was shoved under the rug then it could’ve changed the rest of the interaction. Which could’ve been displayed by her becoming quiet and not expressing her opinion because of my potential reaction. Also, if not dealt with right away it would grow and end up with an overreaction later as feelings are stored up.

            I really appreciated how Carmen brought this conflict up right away. She had the desire to address the conflict directly and resolve it, making it a constructive interaction between us. I have more of an avoidance character when conflict arises, so I would love to adapt this style of dealing with conflict as it would cause less trouble down the road. In future interactions I hope to be more direct about conflicts that arise. Being involved in the one above allowed me to realize what it felt like when the issue is brought up and can be dealt with before there are hurt feelings. Demonstrating that in my own interactions would allow for stronger relationships in the future. This would result in constructive interactions tackling the problem before it becomes the problem, as they act in more of a preventive way.  

Reference

Wood, J. T. (2012). Interpersonal communication: Everyday encounters. (7^th ed., p. 232).

 Boston, MA: Wadsworth, Cengage Learning.